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For if a man know not - Method is a matter of great importance in all the affairs of life. It is a true saying, He that does little with his head must do much with his hands; and even then the business is not half done for want of method. Now, he who has a proper method of doing business will show it in every affair of life, even the least. He who has a disorderly family has no government of that family; he probably has none because he has no method, no plan, of presiding. It was natural for the apostle to say, If a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the Church of God? Look at a man's domestic arrangements; if they be not good, he should not be trusted with any branch of government, whether ecclesiastical or civil.

For if a man know not how to rule - This is a beautiful and striking argument. A church resembles a family. It is, indeed, larger, and there is a greater variety of dispositions in it than there is in a family. The authority of a minister of the gospel in a church is also less absolute than that of a father. But still there is a striking resemblance. The church is made up of an assemblage of brothers and sisters. They are banded together for the same purposes, and have a common object to aim at. They have common feelings and common needs. They have sympathy, like a family, with each other in their distresses and afflictions. The government of the church also is designed to be “paternal.” It should be felt that he who presides over it has the feelings of a father; that he loves all the members of the great family; that he has no prejudices, no partialities, no selfish aims to gratify.

Now, if a man cannot govern his own family well; if he is severe, partial, neglectful, or tyrannical at home, how can he be expected to take charge of the more numerous “household of faith” with proper views and feelings? If, with all the natural and strong ties of affection which bind a father to his own children; if, when they are few comparatively in number, and where his eye is constantly upon them, he is unable to govern them aright, how can he be expected to preside in a proper manner over the larger household where he will be bound with comparatively feebler ties, and where he will be exposed more to the influence of passion, and where he will have a much less constant opportunity of supervision? Confucius, as quoted by Doddridge, has a sentiment strikingly resembling that before us: “It is impossible that he who knows not how to govern and reform his own family, should rightly govern and reform a people.” We may remark, also, in this verse, a delicate and beautiful use of words by the apostle to prevent the possibility of misapprehension. While he institutes a comparison between the government of a family and that of the church, he guards against the possibility of its being supposed that he would countenance “arbitrary” authority in the church, even such authority as a father must of necessity employ in his own family. Hence, he uses different words. He speaks of the father as “ruling” over his own family, or “presiding over it” - προστῆναι prostēnaihe describes the minister of religion as “having a tender care for the church” - ἐπιμελὴσεται epimelēsetaif0.

Those who cannot wisely manage their own child or children are not qualified to act wisely in church matters or to deal with wiry minds subject to Satan's special temptations. If they can cheerfully and lovingly perform the part required of them as parents, then they can better understand how to bear burdens in the church. Dear sister, I advise you to make a good wife to your husband and a good home for him. Rely upon your own resources, and lean less heavily upon him. Arouse yourself to do the very work which the Lord would have you do. You are inclined to be anxious to do some great work, to fill some large mission, and neglect the small duties right in your path, which are just as necessary to be accomplished as the larger. You walk over these and aspire to a larger work. Let your ambition be aroused to be useful, to be a workman in the world instead of a spectator. 2T 568.1

My dear sister, I speak plainly; for I dare not do otherwise. I plead with you to take up life's burdens instead of shunning them. Help your husband by helping yourself. The ideas which you both hold of the dignity to be maintained by the minister are not in accordance with the example of our Lord. The minister of Christ should possess sobriety, meekness, love, long-suffering, forbearance, pity, and courtesy. He should be circumspect, elevated in thought and conversation, and of blameless deportment. This is gospel dignity. But if a minister comes to a family where he can wait on himself, he should do so by all means; and he should by his example encourage industry by engaging in physical labor when he has not a multiplicity of other duties and burdens. He will not detract from his dignity, and will better relate himself to health and life, by engaging in useful labor. The circulation of the blood will be better equalized. Physical labor, a diversion from mental, will draw the blood from the brain. It is essential for your husband to have more physical labor in order to relieve the brain. Digestion will be promoted by physical exercise. If he would spend a part of every day in physical exercise, when not positively urged by a protracted effort in a course of meetings, it would be an advantage to him, and would not detract from ministerial dignity. The example would be in accordance with that of our divine Master. 2T 568.2

We love you, and want you to be successful in your efforts in striving for the better life. 2T 569.1

“It is written in the prophets, And they shall be all taught of God. Every man therefore that hath heard, and hath learned of the Father, cometh unto me”—not through confessionals or priests or popes, but through Me, your Saviour. “Not that any man hath seen the Father, save he which is of God, he hath seen the Father. Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me hath everlasting life.” This is the absolute Godhead. The mightiest created intellect cannot comprehend Him; words from the most eloquent tongue fail to describe Him. Silence is eloquence. 7BC 914.1

Christ represented His Father to the world, and He represents before God the chosen ones in whom He has restored the moral image of God. They are His heritage. To them He says, “He that hath seen me hath seen the Father.” “No man knoweth ... the Father, save the Son, and he to whomsoever the Son will reveal him.” No priest, no religionist, can reveal the Father to any son or daughter of Adam. 7BC 914.2

Men have only one Advocate, one Intercessor, who is able to pardon transgression. Shall not our hearts swell with gratitude to Him who gave Jesus to be the propitiation for our sins? Think deeply upon the love the Father has manifested in our behalf, the love that He has expressed for us. We cannot measure this love. Measurement there is none. We can only point to Calvary, to the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world. It is an infinite sacrifice. Can we comprehend and measure infinity? ... 7BC 914.3

12. Eli's Criminal Neglect—The course of Eli—his sinful indulgence as a father, and his criminal neglect as a priest of God—presents a striking and painful contrast to the firmness and self-denial of the faithful Hannah. Eli was acquainted with the divine will. He knew what characters God could accept, and what He would condemn. Yet he suffered his children to grow up with unbridled passions, perverted appetites, and corrupt morals. 2BC 1009.1

Eli had instructed his children in the law of God, and had given them a good example in his own life; but this was not his whole duty. God required him, both as a father and as a priest, to restrain them from following their own perverse will. This he had failed to do (The Signs of the Times, November 10, 1881). 2BC 1009.2

Warning to Parents Following Eli's Example—If parents who are following Eli's example of neglect could see the result of the education they are giving their children, they would feel that the curse which fell on Eli would assuredly fall on them. The sin of rebellion against parental authority, lies at the very foundation of the misery and crime in the world today (The Signs of the Times, November 10, 1881). 2BC 1009.3